Do you feel like you don't get noticed or receive the right kind of recognition in your professional and social life? Whether you feel like your life got off on the wrong foot or think you are one of those people who blend into the background, you’re probably wondering why more people don’t seem to actively like you. I’m not suggesting you’re shunned by fellow students, teammates, or co-workers; I'm asserting there is some kind of wall between you and the rest of them that you’d like to see crumble, but you’re not sure of the best way to break it down.

This can take a lot out of you and your performance, be it in a classroom, on a sports field, or on the job. When you're not feeling your best, you're not doing your best. Along with possibly not being liked, there’s a sense that the people around you don’t respect you, either.

There have been times in life when I felt like the people around me just didn’t understand me and that led to a divide I needed to overcome.

Here are several of the techniques I have used to become more liked and respected.

1. Exceed Expectations 

Whatever it is you’re doing, do it well. Never be late or miss a deadline. We all have expectations. Figure out what the average person would do and exceed it. The results should speak for themselves.

2. Treat Others with Respect

While you may feel like you get the cold shoulder from those around you, don’t send it back in their direction. Treat the people around you the way that you wish to be treated. If you find yourself exhibiting the same behavior they do, stop. The solution may simply be a matter of someone extending the olive branch. Be that person.

3. Invite People

Whether it’s lunch or an art exhibit opening after work, look for opportunities to bond with people outside of your traditional environment. Find team-building activities and pursue them. You can’t get everybody to come along, but if people see you as open to building bridges, they’ll be more open to making the connection on their end.

4. Be A Good Listener

Maybe you fold your arms and just nod when people are talking, and you’re only waiting for your turn to speak. Nothing puts people off more than not feeling like they’ve been heard – and it’s not just the big stuff. If somebody is telling you about their pet or child, make a mental note, and ask about that pet or child at a later date. People appreciate being heard.

5. Admit Your Mistakes

Let's say you’re the catcher on a baseball team and, at the end of the game, there's going to be a close play at home plate. The ball gets there in time, but you fail to tag the runner, and the other team wins. Don’t blame the thrower, or the umpire, or the sun that got in your eyes. Own up to your mistakes in a public way, and if you can, explain how you’ll try to fix it, so the same mistake isn’t made twice.

6. Ask for Help

People like it when you consider them the expert on something and need their assistance. What’s the worst that can happen? They’ll say no? If they do, move onto the next person. Also, when you’ve completed a task, seek out feedback. People love to know that you consider their opinions valuable.