Your career is one way to nurture yourself, your self-confidence and your self-worth. Welcome to autumn everybody, and welcome to a new blog series! We spent the summer examining Napoleon Hill's book, Think and Grow Rich. Now it's time to get down to a level that every single one of us can relate to — the self.

Say "No" to Self-Doubt

It’s normal to doubt yourself, especially if you’re trying something new. It’s also common to sometimes feel like a failure — and it’s completely understandable when you fail at something in the moment. However, failure can lead to self-doubt; if you're not careful, it can become one of your most self-destructive ingrained personality traits. For whatever reason, some people feel incapable or unworthy of high achievement, happiness or success.Is this how you feel?Thinking in such a way is a shame, and over the next four weeks, we'll talk about how you can avoid self-defeating thoughts. The topics will cover several areas where you reflect upon your levels of self-confidence and self-worth and think about the influence you have on others, be they friends, family or co-workers.

Nurture Your Career; Nurture Yourself

Consider this quote: “Confidence comes naturally with success, but success comes only to those who are confident.” – UnknownSelf-confidence and self-worth are two personality traits that don’t take long for others to pick up on and react toward. Don’t you find yourself drawn to people who seem confident in themselves and believe they have worth? Conversely, don’t you find people who are meek and overly self-doubting a chore to be around? The workplace displays how we react to others’ self-confidence and self-worth more than any other location.

Think about the best bosses you’ve had.

• Were they a bundle of nerves, worrying about every little thing, even when having to make tough decisions?

• Were they decisive leaders who understood that mistakes might be made but didn’t let that hold them back?

• Did they let their employees run roughshod over the office or did they lead them with a firm, but fair demeanor?

• Did they try to build up their employees and get the best out of them?

You’ve probably seen fellow employees either get promotions or be hired away by other companies to work at much better positions. Many of these people most likely have the same kind of self-confidence and self-worth that your best managers have displayed.If you’ve found yourself somewhat envious of those who appear to have these personality traits and worry you can’t develop them, don’t fret.Changing your demeanor in the office is possible if you can work to internalize a few ideas and behavioral traits.

Turn Negative Responses into Positive Actions

The following information will help you use your career to nurture your self-confidence and self-worth.

1. When you find yourself reacting negatively to criticism, take a moment and ask yourself what that’s about.

Many people treat criticism as a personal attack, and it rarely ever is. Usually, it’s an opportunity for someone else to improve upon an idea or provide you with correct information when you're wrong. Criticism is not given out of spite. Next time, try looking at the criticism objectively and figure out why somebody is offering it. With practice, you’ll learn it has very little to do with you personally.

2. Try to end all of your negative thinking beyond just criticism.

If you’re stuck in a negative mindset at work, you’re going to have to deprogram yourself. It’s as simple as just putting the word “STOP” on your computer terminal or making your screen saver a stop sign. Any visual cue that reminds you to stop the negative thoughts will do.

3. When opportunities arise, get out of your comfort zone as it often means you're stuck in a rut.

When you're too comfortable in your career, you need to accept challenges and assume risks that don’t come naturally. It’s also how you’re going to prove to yourself, through action, that you're more than your negative self-image is trying to dictate. New challenges will help you conquer your self-destructive tendencies and prove they don't have to take control of your life!

4. Finally, if you find yourself keeping score of how you’ve been wronged and who has taken advantage of you, try pulling a full-180.

Start keeping score of what you’re doing right. Make sure before you leave work every day to write down three positive things that happened. Maybe you spoke up at a meeting or agreed to spearhead the office holiday food drive. Perhaps you brought donuts in or accepted the compliments of co-workers. By the end of the week, you’ll have a list of 15 things you’ve done right. Try this for a few weeks. You’ll have plenty of reasons to feel confident and worthy of your position, and hopefully know you deserve more!

As a life coach, I can help you nurture yourself by using your career to build self-confidence and self-worth. Send me an email and we'll talk. I've been helping others achieve success in all aspects of their lives and writing about ways people can change their lives for the better.If you'd like to read more of my blogs about how to achieve the life you desire, start with the first one, "4 Ways to Make Monday Less Like ... Monday."